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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Just wondering if anyone has done it, how it helps, and exactly what they do? Anger problems have been in my family for a whille, and I think I have an extreme case. I'm not going into details, but would like some input on maybe someone that has been through it. I have heard medication could be subscribed. Also.. whats the cost of a counsler even? Doesn't it go by session or something?

Thanks in advance
Jon
 

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Anger is healthy, unless you are taught or you began to suppress it long enough that what comes then comes as rage.

Rage will cloud you, rage is not healthy. Everything is solved when you can only express it.

A child that is taught it is not ok to cry as the mother or father says ,"ah no crying now, stop that." Grows up with a program set in the child's mind that crying is not good, especially if you are male...and with many children growing as this, it is no surprise that crying is immaturely insulted as something that a baby does, or a girl...worse, a sissy, p*ssy..whatever names they have invented for it. Be strong to define yourself as beyond all this illusions.

What you suppress, grows, the energy so heavy that you will literally tremble, shaking when it explodes...your words, your actions...it won't be a surprise if you are unable to control them. Pain stored inside, becomes bad depression...

So learn to use the good emotions, anger, envy, sadness, happiness...learn to express. Don't let the anger turn into rage, to hatred, don't let the envy turn into jealousy, the sadness into suffering...the quicker you express, the quicker you move pass it.

Use it, that's why you have it...these are your tools, use them. Next time you are angry at someone, learn to speak about it...but before that, throw your emotions away so you can think straight to make a wise decision. Know what you are doing, be sensitive to it, be aware of yourself and your surrounding, be conscious. Or you can use your anger by doing something else if you realize that the anger, the rage is unnecessary...you can have a punching bag and release your anger at it, just use your body...use the emotion, as the biochemical is released into your body, you are to use it, don't leave it inside to be poisoned.

Good luck
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks for all of that Silence.

Problem is.. this has been going on for a while now. I have tried many things.. breathing.. just walking away.. talking about it.. ect. But nothing works.

Its often, and most of the time does lead to one or more things like rage, depression, or jealously, and after a few minutes to a couple hours, than the sorrow. I feel like the lowest thing on earth. I just want to take everything out on myself and regret everything I did.

I just feel like maybe I should talk to a professional, possibly get some anti-depressants.. who knows. It is ruining my relationship with my girlfriend, and sometimes my with my family as well.

Mainly, when I am so upset I usually start breaking things; say a lot of hurtful things that I do not mean; or get so freaked out I almost make myself sick, and unable to function or work for a while afterwords. Then basically I become so emotional .. I break down.

No, I am not afraid to cry. Most of the time I am so pissed off at the time, I can't cry. That don't come until the depression afterwords kicks in. Then alls I want to do is lay with with my music blaring.. wondering what the hell I did.
 

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You know the source of this anger, this pain, this sorrow...focusing on the source of it will help you understand why and how to solve, by changing things...within you if not without, remember you will only be striked if you allow something inside you, like Love..attachments... Hold on, I have been watching the entire episode of Star Wars on t.v, right now episode IV is about to start, I will be right back after this! look after yourself!
 

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I have returned, the Force is imbalanced in you because you have not decided who you are. And who you are is whoever you choose to be.

Remember, everything you will ever need is yourself. However disastrous out of the flesh may be, with the peace of within, even if you die, it would be a peaceful one.

Now let's move to necessary points, the question you must ask yourself is ,"who am I?" Can you define yourself as a person Jon? Your ideas, your characters, what connects to you, what disconnects with you, your desire, your choices, decisions, your dreams...and the experience you choose, life.

The problem will be solved once you have decided who you are. As easy as I have said it, performing it won't be. I sense this problem you have arises from the woman you Love, is that true?

If I am, you must ask yourself what is it that occurs which make you feel as you do. Why? What are you unsatisfied with? What do you fear? Why does it turn into anger when all you wanted to do is to express compassion, the loving part of you? Why jealousy? After all has been said and done, the pain is added with your regret.

To move forward is by first forgiving yourself and forgive yourself you must. Great mistakes can happen, take them as your lessons...sometimes you wish you would never wish to do something, you never thought of it, you never thought it was possible of you...and it has happened...you cannot believe that it has happened. Dwell you will, in your disappointments, pain, sorrow..eating you up inside..turning you into something you have not chosen to be.

Be strong, and you only will by having the strength to not just look pass this, but by bringing your mind, body and soul together walking pass things you never wished to have done. Everybody makes mistakes, Jon...sometimes we are so sure of ourselves that when we have disappointed that part of us...we fall, and we fall forever...once striked within, it won't be easy Jon. Let go...have you heard of Souls that are still around because they are still attached to the physical? It could be anything, their property, relationship...unsatisfied, dwell they choose and dwell they will...

Let go...stay with yourself, need you alone, for however great Love is, when it does not bring happiness...then you have lost your path. And what is the point of that? Have you forgiven yourself? And are you forgiven by the one you care? Does this one bother you more than anything else? Clear your mind, throw away your thoughts if they are clouding you, your emotions, know what is the real situation, and why does it bother you? What do you choose out of this?

Have you disappointed yourself and the one you Love? Speak out...speak out to the one closest to you, that person...ask yourself what would it take to heal yourself and your relationship? What are you unhappy with? I will stop here.
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If I have misunderstood, forgive me...you are holding yourself, suppressing, it's not easy for you to open up, you do not wish to, yet you wish you will just do so....you have stored so much inside, it is difficult for you.
 
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Ive found Anger to be more influenced by insecurity than anythig else.

Tell us about some things which almost always trigger your anger.

BTW, we are all just people trying to help...if you feel this is a serious problem, I would look for a counsellor (a counsellor wont feed you pills like a doc or a pyschiatrist, they will help you through talking).

Maybe you need to re invent yourself? Start with smaller things, and when your traditional thought process is gone, so may your anger?
 

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get a hooker...

no no no, jk.

danny and silence are right. it usually starts with being slightly insecure. that insecurity makes you very snappy and open to have outbursts of rage. i used to get it all the time when i didnt have a job. now im a lot better. i still get pissed off, but not to the extent that i used to.

if it's something that runs in your family then you should start with an anger counsellor. if what they try with you doesnt work, then talk to your family doctor, as it might be a chemical imbalance which brings out the anger.

what i found GREAT for getting rid of my anger was playing full contact sports. like hockey or rugby. that way you can take your aggression out on someone on a field or rink, instead of on the street or in a store or at home.lol
 

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Holy crap. I have seen silence say some crazy things. I don't usually comment on them, but he is right on the mark on this one. In a nutshell you need to understand your anger and express it in a less violent manner.

A counselor or therapist can help if you find the right one.
 

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I have currently under gone anger management. I got referred after Iraq. The "doctor" that I saw the last few times has told me of a medication. He says 'it makes you happy'. I told him I would be fine on my own, I don't need a pill to make me happier. But to each his own, you may need it worse than I. Next time I go to the VA clinic I'll be sure to ask what its called.

Matt
 
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